A Really Dumb Story

A Really Dumb Story

“The footsteps echoed off the walls of the dark hallway, moving closer to the closed bedroom door.

 ‘Wheeeere’s my golden arm?’ 

The eerie voice made the greedy woman hide under the covers and clutch her prize closer.  She heard her bedroom door creeeeak open, and soon she felt a presence standing over her. 

 ‘WHO HAS MY GOLDEN ARM?!’  The woman held her breath as the room stilled.   

‘Who haaaaas my arrrrrrrrm….YOU’VE GOT IT!’”

Tanek grabbed me by the shoulders and I shrieked from fright and then punched his arm.  

“Dude!  I have heard that story a zillion times, but you have the spookiest voice.  Feel my heart!  I can’t believe you scared me.”

I put his hand on my racing heart.  He grinned as our eyes connected and then swept one of my curls behind my ear.  Blushing, I cleared my throat and moved to look out the window.  His touch echoed through my body as it had been all day during our hike.

“I wonder how long it will take the others to get here? It’s getting dark and I don’t like the thought of them wandering the woods at night.  They should have caught up to us by now.”  

Tanek moved behind me and peered over my shoulder.  I silently willed him to tip me back for a kiss as our body heat mingled. I missed the feeling of his body near me.  It had been five long years since we broke up, five years since I’ve felt a yearning this strong.  

 “I dunno, Katybird,” he murmured into my ear. 

Katybird.  He gave me that nickname twenty years ago when he caught me tumbling out of the tree framed by the window. I thought that I could fly and he let me try as long as he was on the ground to catch me. I scraped my knees but we ended up laughing on the ground.  We spent so many summers together here at the lake.  It was his family’s vacation home and I lived next door. I caught my first fish with him sitting next to me, and he gave me my first kiss when we were nine.   Our first everythings were tied to this place.  I wondered if his body remembered as well as mine did. 

I leaned a little more into him and breathed in his familiar comfort.   “It’s not like those two to get lost…unless that was their goal. They might be camping in the woods, but she would have told me.   Did you see the way that Melissa was looking at Nicholas on the hike up from the lake? They’ve been together since high school and still act like new lovers.  Maybe she went grizzly on him and mauled his cute fuzzy butt. ”  

Tanek laughed, “Oh?  What do you know about his butt?  Is there something I don’t know?” He tickled my ribs until I squirmed. 

“Ha!  Nooooooo!  She talks about her ‘sweet Nicholas’ until I am nauseous. She has a whole sketch book of drawings that she made of JUST HIS BUTT!  She blew up on canvas that butt selfie he made when he was drunk at his birthday party,” I paused and felt my pulse quicken from his closeness, “Do you remember that night?”

He turned me to face him and held me loosely.  “Katybird, I will never forget that night.  You and I, dancing there by the fireplace and then our first whole night together.”

He pulled me close and searched my eyes for approval.  I stood on tiptoe to reach for a kiss, our lips met, and the years melted away. Soft lips eagerly crushed against my waiting mouth and my tongue twisted around his as a low growl came from deep within me.   His hands deftly undid the buttons on my flannel shirt as I dropped his pants to the floor. He kicked off pants and scooped me up to carry me to his king sized bed.  

“You sure, sweetheart? It’s been a long time and I know we’ve both had others.” He looked worried as he gingerly placed me on the comforter. 

“Yeah.  Others.” I blushed and looked away,  “It’s never been the same.  Each new face or experience never compares to this.”

“Honestly,  for the past five years I was terrified that you would fall in love and forget about me. Katy, I never stopped loving you,” Tanek’s voice cracked and he took a deep breath.  He rolled to his side and drew circles on my belly before kissing me right above my navel.  He nibbled a little trail up the center of my body pausing only in the valley of my breasts to run his tongue over the soft skin. I was trembling by the time he reached my lips again while folding me into his strong muscled arms.  We moved with familiarity and trust. I arched my body towards him and hooked my heels around his calves.  He began working his way back down my body.  Each kiss felt like a promise and the years that separated us disappeared.   I reached to snag a condom from the beside stash. Tanek was nuzzling his way over my hip bones while trying to pry off my jeans.  He was lost in the moment.  I poked him in the head.

“Hey, no condoms?”

“What? Oh. Yeah. I threw them all away years ago.  I never wanted to bring another girl here.  I couldn’t.  This place was ours and well IS mine now…really…ummm so I meant to tell you, I bought this place from my parents.  It’s mine. I was going to announce it this weekend to everyone. I have some in my backpack.  Wait here.”

I admired the view as he hurried to the living room.  His cock was poking out of his striped boxers and bobbed while he hustled to get the only thing that would come between us tonight.  I hoped he had more than one.  He was gone longer than he should have been and I decided to check on him. 

“Katy!  I think we need to call for help.”

“Tanek?  What?”  I walked in the room and was surprised to see the door open.  He was looking at something on the porch.  I moved to get a closer look.  

“Those are Melissa’s hiking boots!   What is that all over them?” 

“Don’t!”  He tried to stop me, but I bent to pick one up to see it in the light.  

“I think it’s blood.  Blood??” Fear gripped my bare belly.  I shouted into the night,   “Melissa!   Are you out there?  MEEEEELIIIISSSAAA!”  The moonlit forest offered no reply. 

“We should get a flashlight,” Tanek suggested.  

“And put some clothes on,” I giggled as I looked at Tanek’s cock peeping from his shorts, “I’m sure she’s fine. She probably got a bloody nose or is having a really rough period.  I feel like a murder scene is happening in in my pants some months.”  

We dressed, made out a little on the couch and then went to search for our friend.  We held hands in the dark as the flashlight whispered across emptiness.  Gravel crunched under our feet in a comforting rhythm as we approached my Jeep.  

“Maybe we should drive around and look for them.”  He pointed the light towards my vehicle.

“What the fuck?!” He almost dropped the flashlight as my body unleashed a shriek of terror.  The light shone on the words “YOUR NEXT” smeared in red on the hood.  He ran a tentative finger through the glistening words.  

“It’s ketchup.  It’s probably a prank. Your? Seriously?”  He started laughing, “At least we are dealing with someone who isn’t very bright.”

“It’s not funny!  What if my Melissa is hurt…or worse?!  She’s my best friend.  I like Nick, too, but I couldn’t live without Melissa.”

“We will figure this out, Katybird. We’ll find them.”  He swept the flashlight over the forest again and stopped.

“Katy.  Honey.  Do you have your keys?”

“Yes, why?” I sniffled as I fished my keys out of my pocket.  

“I need you to get into the Jeep.  We need to go.”

“What is it?”  I looked to where the flashlight beam was pointing.  On the ground there was a hand.   It looked like a woodland creature nestled in the leaves and it took a moment for my brain to realize that it was no longer attached to a body.  

I froze.  Tanek grabbed my hand and forcibly pulled me away from the spectacle.   “We need to get help. Now.”  

The engine was barely noticeable at first and perhaps was a model plane that was coming in a little close.  The smell of oil burning hit us both as the droning revved up and became the unmistakable throaty battle of a chainsaw’s whine. The sound was moving fast towards us and we broke into a run.  I got to the Jeep first and Tanek shoved me over the seats as he hurried to close us safely into the vehicle.  

He was shoving the key into the ignition as a dark form emerged from between the trees.  It saw us and began to run holding the chainsaw aloft.  Tanek started backing up spitting gravel with the tires.  Sweat beaded on his pale face as he frantically swung the Jeep around.  The headlights slashed across the figure.

“Melissa!  That’s Melissa!”  Her arm poured blood from where her hand should have been as she shuffled barefoot on the driveway. “STOP!”

I tumbled out my door and rushed to my friend.

“Kaaaaaty,” she moaned, “Help me.  I need to tell you…”

“I’ve got you.  Let’s get you to a hospital.”

I heard Tanek yell something, but I was too close to rescuing  Melissa.  

I felt a presence behind me and turned to see the flash of a knife in the air.

“We just want to saay,” a deep voice rumbled in my ear, “That…YOU’RE NEXT!”  

Suddenly, the man grabbed me.  I screamed and wet my pants.  Melissa burst out laughing and waggled her still attached perfectly fine hand in my face.  

“Look! We’re engaged!” she squealed, “Nicholas set all of this up!”  

I stood in a pool of my urine.  Terror drained from by body.  I stared blankly as Nicholas swept Melissa in his arms and kissed her as blood dripped from her fake stump.  Tanek finally caught up to us and I noted that he was carrying a tire iron. 

“It wasn’t real?” Tanek gasped.

 Nicholas grinned.  

“I sure had you going, man. A tire iron versus a chainsaw?!  Hahah! Goodnight you guys.  I’m going to drag my victim into the woods for a little more chasing.  Someone needs to die tonight!,” Nicholas cackled. 

“I’m so scared,” Melissa giggled, “Make me die a thousand little deaths. We’re engaged!!!  Love you guys!  See you in the morning!” We watched our friends dart back into the woods and their laughter echoed into the night. Tanek and I walked back to the cabin.   

“That was way better than my ghost stories. How about a nice hot shower and then we can cuddle?”

“What did they mean ‘You’re next?’” 

Tanek folded me in his arms and kissed the top of my head.  “Well, I just bought this place, and it’s big enough for two. Let’s stick together and find out.”

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